The Under-qualified Bride

You know what the truth is?

I’m not really built to plan a wedding. It’s not in my gifting. It’s not part of my skill set. It’s not anything I’m interested in… let alone, good at.

I don’t pay attention to details. I don’t like working within a schedule. I’m a bad coordinator, administrator, and director. And when I know there’s an expectation I’m supposed to live up to, I absolutely, defiantly fall below it.

See what I’m getting at?

Me and weddings? We just don’t do well together. 

And you know what else…

By the end of mile two today… I realized something… I’m really not built to run.

My legs are short, my torso is long, my feet are clumsy, and my arms are completely uncoordinated. See this? This is might be me… http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V1k658QIFBE

That’s only kind of a joke. If you see a girl flailing down Main Street feel free to yell my name…

I’m unmotivated. I’m undisciplined. I may as well just walk I’m so stinkin’ slow. I don’t like sore muscles. And I’m certainly not invigorated by reaching “marathon” condition, like you over achievers. More power to ya’, but the only way this girl’s gonna see 26 miles, is in the car.

So why do I do these things? Why on earth do I put myself through this?

Well the way I see it, there’s only one of two options; I’m either addicted to making seriously demented masochistic goals, or somewhere inside the very deepest recesses of myself, disguised in negativity and hidden under a mountain of complaints, I see some value in it.

I guess in my short 20 years of life, I’ve learned the most worthwhile things, the things that have brought the most goodness and wholeness to my life and the lives of others, have been the very things I didn’t want to do, and often the things, “I was never made for.”

Once I started following Jesus, I quickly became aware, “Wow, I was not built for this.” And two years later, after dying to almost every one of my dearest dreams and idealistic expectations for my life, I’m saying, “Wow. I WAS NOT built for this!”

 Maybe demented masochist wasn’t that far off…

No. I’m kidding.

It’s true. I’m not built for this. I’m selfish. I’m prideful. I’m sinful. I’m hurtful. I’m completely wrapped up in myself. And I’m totally unqualified to be called a follower of Jesus.

So why do I do it?

“Then the Lord God formed man from the dust of the ground, and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life; and man became a living being.” Genesis 2: 7

You see, God chooses to use something totally unqualified to fulfill His purposes. He uses something completely incompetent to make something wonderful, beautiful, and worthwhile. He uses the inanimate to create life.

He made us out of dust people, DUST…

Now I’m not trying to feed my ego here… but I like to think I have a little more to bring to the table than a big ol’ pile of dirt.

If God can choose to use DIRT to make a human being… I have no doubt He can use even the dirt in my life to make something beautiful out of me.

Okay, so I lied. I guess it’s not that I’m “not built” for these things. It’s that in doing them, it means submitting myself to a process of change and transformation

.

It means taking what I’m not built for and building something far better than just the “what you see is what you get” parts of me.

So maybe I’m not built to be a follower of Jesus… maybe I’m not built to be a runner… maybe I’m not built to be a bride…

But that’s no excuse to just “be who I am,” because I bet if I give up “who I’m not,” I’ll become someone way better than I ever intended.

Being a bride? It’s something I never intended…

But it’s kind of beautiful isn’t it?


And if that's not convincing enough for you... If Pheobe can do it? So can we. 


Wedding Count:
129 days- 8 miles